by Bakhytzhan Oskeyeva, PhD student in Public Policy, University of North Carolina at Charlotte

As I prepare for the upcoming MPSA Annual Conference, I find myself juggling multiple roles—researcher, attendee, and, most importantly, a single mother of two wonderful children: my 13-year-old daughter and my 10-year-old son. As an international PhD student, attending a conference is always an exciting opportunity to engage with like-minded professionals, exchange ideas, and immerse myself in the latest developments in my field. However, for single parents, especially single moms like me, the experience comes with its own set of challenges and considerations. In this pre-conference blog, I want to share my thoughts as I embark on this journey.

Seeking Help and Support

Attending a conference as a single mom also means recognizing when to ask for help. It’s important to reach out to colleagues, organizers, and friends for support. Whether it’s assistance with navigating the conference schedule, finding childcare solutions, or simply having someone to discuss key sessions with, asking for help can make a huge difference. The worst that can happen is that someone declines, but often, people are more than willing to lend a hand. Learning to rely on a supportive network can ease the challenges and make the experience more enriching.

Balancing Responsibilities: The Logistics of Attending

One of the biggest hurdles of attending a conference as a single mom is managing childcare. While many attendees can simply pack their bags and head to the event, I need to carefully coordinate my children’s care, ensuring that everything is in place while I’m away. This means arranging for reliable childcare, preparing meals in advance, and making sure my kids feel secure in my absence. It’s a logistical puzzle, but one I willingly solve because of the value I see in participating in this conference.

In addition to childcare, I also need to plan financially. Conferences can be expensive, with registration fees, travel, and accommodation costs quickly adding up. Securing funding, seeking grants, and being strategic about expenses are crucial for making this experience manageable.

Why This Conference Matters to Me

Single parents often have to make difficult choices between prioritizing family and participating in conferences or professional events. The demands of parenting can sometimes make it seem like attending such events is impossible. However, I firmly believe that this does not have to be a binary decision. With proper planning and support, participation in conferences can align perfectly with parenting responsibilities. It is not about choosing one over the other, but rather about integrating both aspects of life in a way that allows for growth and balance.

Despite the challenges, attending this conference is not just important—it’s essential. As a researcher and academic, I need to stay engaged in my field, network with peers, and gain fresh insights that will shape my work. Conferences provide that much-needed intellectual stimulation and the chance to be part of conversations that matter.

More importantly, as a single mother, I want to set an example for my children. I want them to see that pursuing knowledge and professional growth is possible, no matter the circumstances. I want to show them that passion and perseverance can create opportunities, even in the face of obstacles. My daughter, who is becoming more independent, and my son, who is curious about the world, inspire me every day to push forward.

Setting Expectations and Goals

Before attending this conference, I set clear goals for myself. I want to attend sessions that align with my research interests, connect with scholars who can offer new perspectives, and perhaps even explore collaboration opportunities. I also plan to document my experience as a conference blogger, capturing the essence of the event from my unique perspective. Writing about this experience not only helps me process my learnings but also allows me to contribute to the broader community of scholars navigating similar experiences.

Another goal is to take some time for myself—to step away from my daily routine and truly immerse myself in this experience. As a single mom, my life revolves around responsibilities, and this conference is a rare opportunity to focus on my personal and professional growth without distractions.

Looking Ahead

As I finalize my preparations, I am both excited and a little nervous. Excited for the opportunity, the knowledge, and the connections I will gain; nervous about leaving my children, even temporarily, and making sure everything runs smoothly in my absence. But I remind myself that taking this step is not just for me—it’s for my career, my passion, and for the example I am setting for my children.

Managing the responsibilities of research, parenting, and navigating a cancer diagnosis adds another layer of complexity to this journey. However, I refuse to let these challenges dictate my limitations. Attending this conference is not just about professional development—it is about resilience, determination, and the ability to thrive despite adversity.

For other single parents attending conferences, I hope this blog resonates with you. We may face unique challenges, but our dedication to our fields and our families drives us forward. If you’re attending MPSA, I’d love to connect and share insights on navigating this journey together.

Stay tuned for my next post, where I’ll share my experiences from the conference floor, the sessions that made an impact, and the connections that shaped my time at the event.

 

About the Author

Bakhytzhan Oskeyeva is a PhD student in Public Policy at the University of North Carolina at Charlotte. Her research focuses on international war, propaganda, and political communication. As an international student from Kazakhstan, she balances her academic pursuits with being a single mother to her two children. She is passionate about understanding the intersection of media, politics, and public perception. You can follow her journey at www.linkedin.com/in/bakhytzhan-oskeyeva, @boskeyev.bsky.social, https://www.facebook.com/baha.oskeyeva/